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jerzeycate, April 16,  2021  11:04am EST

Occular Stroke...

Last year I had an Occular Stroke that left me with severely impaired vision...20/400 == Legally Blind.
It was the height of the Covid Lockdown (even here in Florida) so it took awhile to find and then see an Opthamologist.
The doctor/surgeon made no promises but there were several treatment protocols available.
I followed all his recommendations.
In November of 2020 I had surgery on the left eye. Afer healing the vision  in that eye was 20/20.
In March I had surgery on the right eye. Vision, with 3 more weeks of healing to go, is 20/20.
Even in the depths of our despair there is always some hope... Another doctor/surgeon who can offer advice/treatment options.
Never, Never lose Hope.
I wrote this piece after the first surgery... It's even more relevant today...


 But Now I See...

My vision severely impaired,
The world became a scary place.
A collection of shadowy blobs.
No clear-cut shape.
No distinct identity.
No specific meaning.
Everything running together,
Stitched with colors that had no names.

The simple visual cues gone,
I could no longer make sense of my surroundings.
Leaving the house created paralyzing fear.
Everyday activities were a recipe for disaster.

Unable to assign labels
I struggled to describe what I saw.
My capacity to attach meaning slipped away,
With it went my ability to process the world.
I was embarrassed.
I was afraid.
Confusion was the norm,

Isolation gave me some control.
Hopelessness crept in as I fell into a pool of defeat.
I labelled the darkness punishment.
My Spirit struggled to stay afloat.

After months of fearing I’d never see again,
As depression began to swallow me whole,
Surgery repaired my vision.
The blobs were gone.
Just like that I could see.

Life seems to work out.
God provides options.
His miracles never end.

While the loss of my vision was devastating,
It was a blessing in disguise.
Months of darkness 
Compelled me to peel back layers of anger and doubt.
Made me conquer multiple obstacles each day.
Pushed me to master challenges long ago abandoned.
Enabled me to face old fears,
To find an unimaginable strength within.

The struggle brought true independence,
Renewed the hope that fuels my life.
The journey opened my heart.
The battle bolstered my faith.

In the darkest of moments,
God showed me His Light.
In losing my vision 
I learned how to see.


It's A Great Day To Be Alive...


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