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mattorrez, February 6,  2019  9:38am EST

Need Help :(

TL;DR: Dad may have dementia, mom is overweight, sister has disabilities, no income. Need advice/Resources to help them

Hey everyone! I need some advice for my girlfriend’s family. Her dad (age 57) had a stroke about 3 months ago and is suffering from some symptoms that resemble dementia. He often talks about previous events like it just happened and in general is not remembering things. He has not been diagnosed with anything, but the symptoms haven’t improved much in the last 2 months. He can get frustrated and yell at his wife when she tries to correct him.

Furthermore, my girlfriend’s mom (age 57) has very limited mobility due to her weight and struggles to do simple activities like going to the grocery store. She does not work and Dad’s employer is trying to cut off their disability pay. The family has some significant debt and my girlfriend’s sister who, due to their special needs, currently lives at home and will not likely be able to move out on their own.

Does anyone have any advice on places where we can get further informed on how to help them with these situations? We moved across the country to be closer to them but feel like there isn’t much we can do.  Any ideas would be appreciated!

2 Replies
  • Kdogg240
    Kdogg240, February 6,  2019  2:55pm EST

    Hi mattorrez, first I would talk to his neurologist to make sure there was not a diagnosis. Then I would say try to find out about the terms of his disability through work. Is it long term disability (LTD) or short  term disability? He may be able to file for for SSDI (social security disability insurance). There is a lot of paperwork involved with all these things, but it sounds like the family may already know about disability with her sister already being disabled. Tell your girlfriend to try and be proactive with learning everything she can about these processes. They can be quite confusing if your not familiar with them. You guys can also go to or call HHS( human health services) they may be able to give you some helpful info on the rights you have. I can tell you that this will be most likely have to be done by your girlfriend or her mother. There are laws in place that only allow someone who is authorized to handle these situations. Good luck to your girlfriend and her family. Hope this was helpful. 

    Best regards


  • AHAASAKatie
    AHAASAKatie, February 7,  2019  9:05am EST

    Good morning, we have quite a bit of information about managing finances after a stroke on our website for you as well. Her family could also look into 211, the United Way’s assistance resources as well. I am so sorry her family is having to manage all of this. Best Katie

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